I'll never be her

'Love is giving someone the power to destroy you, but trusting them not to'

'Jesus laura' 'What' 'I love you'
He's never said that to me, never been so taken aback by how much he loves me. I'll never be her, he'll never be over her. Will i ever be good enough? He compares me to her, and im not her. She left him & i dont think he's really over her. Her her her. Laura. It was Laura he asked for sex. He called her fat to me, laughed at her. To convince himself he was doing nothing wrong, perhaps.
I tell him i love him all the time, because i do. But its always me now adays, its always me saying it first. Last night i said night, and i didn't say love you. He thought i was in a mood with him; i just wanted him to say it first. He didnt, and i ended up saying it first still. Insecurity.
I thought i was having a quiet weekend in with Ally, thats what he wants when im out, he suggested it the last time i was out without him. But now, he's trying to convince me to go to smithys party, he wants to get Kieran. If he goes to the fireworks and out with all those slutty little girls, im not going. Its to make me jealous, it doesnt, it only makes me disapointed.